new year.

there have been times in my life when there are events or milestones or something of significance looming in the future, and i can honestly say i never thought i would actually get to them. getting my driver's license was one of those times. when i was 15, that was all i could think about and the days seemed to drag slowly on and i thought that surely Jesus would come back before i could FINALLY get my driver's license. seeing as i'm 21 1/2 years old and i have my driver's license, that day came and it was the greatest day of my life at the time.
graduating high school was another one of those. i played (almost) all the sports my school had to offer, spent a ton of late nights studying with my best friends, completed my senior thesis and as far as i was concerned, i was ready for college. before i knew it, i was at tcu ready to start my freshman year.
there have been many other points in my life when i have felt this way- that if i can only get past this test week or this group project or this period in my life, there is something great to look forward to just up ahead. well, 2012 is here and there are already things i'm looking forward to.
this year is one of the milestones or times that i never thought would ever roll around. it is the year of my college graduation, it holds in it the semester i'm supposed to go study abroad in italy with one of my best friends, it is the year that my brother is leaving for the navy and my sister will enter her senior year of high school just to name a few. Half of these things i just listed were things i never thought would happen or come to fruition.
unfortunately (or fortunately, whichever way you want to look at it) i have given up on new year's resolutions; i never stopped cracking my knuckles and i still eat ice cream like its necessary for survival. i can't even remember the many other goals i've set for myself but never kept. so while creating a new year's resolution has been at the back of my mind, this new year's celebration caused me to look at another aspect of this year that i often forget about.
i got to go back to camp to celebrate the new year with my second family and we got to chat about what has been going on the past semester since we were all at camp. we got to reflect on what God has been doing in and through us, our struggles and accomplishments, and things we needed prayer for. i stayed an extra night with a couple of my best friends after the reunion was over and we went to a church in austin that the majority of our staff goes to on sundays in the summer and since it was january 1st, it was appropriate that the sermon was over the new year that was before us. the pastor was one i'd never heard speak before but it was good, and exactly what i needed to hear.
he talked about how there are a lot of unexpected things that will unfold in this year that we are unaware of. i have plans, sure, but we can't anticipate for certain all that is in God's plan and the reason we are going through a particular hardship or why we are given the opportunities he gives us but we do know 2 things for certain:
1) God is going to exalt His name this year ["be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." psalm 46:10]
 2) God is going to work everything out for our good. ["and we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are calling according to his purpose." rom. 8:28}
while this just a snippet of what was preached, it was such a humbling truth to rest in. this is going to be a great year and there are a lot of things ahead, but when things don't go exactly my way or the way i have envisioned, how peaceful it is to rest in the fact that He sees the big picture, He is there working even when I can't see Him, He's working for my good, and while the date and year change, He stays the same. He has carved out the story that I will walk in this upcoming year and my prayer is that i will walk forward boldly, knowing my God, my Hope, my Rock, holds me in the palm of His hand and there is nothing to fear because all things happen for His glory and my good.
lastly, i was introduced to a book over the break called the valley of vision. it is a collection of puritan prayers that really are beautifully written and help encourage me in my prayer time with the Lord. i'm not one that reads the king james version or anything and these prayers are written in old english so i do have to use my dictionary app sometimes but this one, appropriately enough, is called new year. i hope and pray that it encourages you as much as it did me and refocuses our hearts on what truly matters as we walk forward this year.

o Lord,
length of days does not profit me except the days are passed in thy presence,
in thy service, to thy glory.
give me a grace that precedes, follows, guides, sustains, sanctifies, aids every hour,
that i may not be one moment apart from thee, but may rely on thy Spirit
to supply every thought,
speak in every word,
direct every step,
prosper every work,
build up every mote of faith,
and give me a desire to show forth thy praise;
testify thy love,
advance thy kingdom.
i launch my bark not he unknown waters of this year,
with thee, o Father, as my harbor
thee, o Son, at my helm,
thee, o Holy Spirit, filling my sails.
guide me to heaven with my loins girt,
my lamp burning,
my ear open to thy calls,
my heart full of love,
my soul free.
give me thy grace to sanctify me,
thy comforts to cheer,
thy wisdom to teach,
thy right hand to guide,
thy counsel to instruct,
thy law to judge,
thy presence to stabilize.
may thy fear be my awe, thy triumphs my joy.